Etiquette Tip of the Week: Plate Rotations

People often ask, "If my entrée is not in the best position to cut, may I turn the plate?"   The answer is, "Yes, you may turn your plate once."  You may not continue to rotate your plate this way and that like you are driving a bus.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: I'll have the soup

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To eat soup properly, do not draw the spoon toward you, but scoop away through the soup, moving the spoon away from you. This way, you are less likely to splash soup on yourself.  (Gentlemen, you may not flip your tie over your shoulder at meals. You must learn to eat neat.)

Sit up straight and bring the soup spoon up to your lips.  Do not bring your lips down to the table.  Sip noiselessly from the side of the spoon (not from the front of the spoon as you were once coaxed as a child with, "Here comes the airplane.") 

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Shake On It!

I am always surprised when I meet a college student or person in business who is the picture of confidence -- smart business attire, great eye contact, smiling, perfect posture -- but then when that person goes in for the handshake... his or her handshake is so lifeless, so limp, I feel like my next step should be to check the person's pulse. 

Your handshake speaks. It must be firm. It should say: "I am intelligent.  I am confident.  And I am darn glad to meet you."

Bon appétit! Etiquette Tip of the Week

There are worse things you can do at a business meal than order steak tartare medium rare.  That is why it is helpful to know how to pronounce items on the menu correctly, so as not to look like a rube to co-workers, clients, interviewers or investors.  Please forgive us, if we are a little saucy in today's Etiquette Tip on how to pronounce a few sauces.

Roux (roo): a mixture of flour and fat used to thicken sauces

Bechamel (BAY-sha-mel): a white sauce with milk, butter, flour and onions

Mornay (mohr NAY): a thick cheese sauce, that is a variation of bechamel sauce

Beurre blanc (burr-blahn): a butter sauce made with white wine or vinegar

Demi-glace (dehm-ee-GLAHSS): a rich brown sauce reduced to a syrupy consistency

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Cocktail (or Mocktail) Refresher

If you have a cocktail (or mocktail), here are a few reminders: 

Do not try and sip through that tiny little straw -- that is a stir stick.  Use it to stir your drink, then discard it (preferably to a waste receptacle and not between the cushions of a chair or couch).

Etiquette Tip of the Week: The Great Thing About Interviewing...

The great thing about interviewing is it is the one time you can tell people how wonderful you are and they are actually willing to listen.

Be honest about your qualifications and experience.  If an interviewer asks, "What is your biggest weakness?"  Do not try to disguise a positive as a negative with a canned baloney answer like, "I work too hard" or "I am a perfectionist."

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Only the Lonely

Here is the person I really don’t get: the person dressed for business on the airplane or in the airport, playing Solitaire on a laptop or other computing device.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Phone Tips

A fun post from our friends at the Culture & Manners Institute about phone manners.

Earlier in my career I worked for Sony Music, the Epic and Columbia recording labels.  I started on the front phones and you can just imagine the crack-open-a-can-of-crazy people that call into a music label. 

  "I am a very close friend of Mariah Carey, but I lost her phone number.  Could you give it to me?"

Me: "Sure, it's right here in my rolodex." (Click.)

One day, a man called in saying he was Eddie Money.  I said, "Right."  I put him on hold and said to the woman at the next desk, "Get this, this guy says he's Eddie Money."

She said, "Did he ask for Mike?"

I said with some hesitation, "Yes..."

She said, "That IS EDDIE MONEY."

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Napkin Apps

Another tip for Banquet Season: if there is an invocation or grace being said before a big banquet, wait until it is completed before you place your napkin in your lap. At a smaller occasion, such as a dinner party, if there is no invocation, place your napkin in your lap when your host does.  Same thing for an interview meal -- wait for your interviewer to place the napkin in his or her lap.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Alas! Which glass?

Banquet Season is upon us. If you go to a fundraising dinner or another special occasion and there is a bottle of red wine and a bottle of white wine on the table and two different sizes of glasses, those who don't know any better automatically pour whichever they want into the larger glass. The red wine goes in the larger glass and the white wine goes in the smaller glass.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: How to Eat Asparagus

Spring has sprung so guess what that means?  Asparagus is on sale.
 
Asparagus may be eaten with the fingers if the stalk is crisp and not flopping over like a wet noodle. 

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Happy Medium

When out on business, whether at a cocktail party or meal, keep the rule, "All things in moderation."  

• Order something not too expensive.
• Do not reach for a second roll out of the bread basket.
• There is no such thing as "all you can eat" in a business meal.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Eating Ice Cream in Public

A frozen dessert ancestor of ice cream originated in China as early as 3000 B.C., according to the book The Art of the Table, by Suzanne Von Drachenfels.  The delectable dessert made its way to Italy in the 13th Century and was introduced into the United States by Thomas Jefferson.

The eating of ice cream in the comfort of your own home with the shades drawn may involve a carton and a large spoon.  However, that is not how it is done in public.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: So You Think You Can Romance?

When the Etiquette Tip of the Week falls on Valentine's Day, the topic of workplace romance is kind of the elephant in the room.  In full disclosure, I must tell you that if not for a workplace romance, the Etiquette Tip of the Week author would not be here.  Her parents met while working in the same hospital in Chicago.  Workplace romances may end in wedded bliss or they may end badly.  Here are a few tips:

Never date anyone whom you directly supervise or who reports to you. 

Avoid dating people with whom you work in close proximity.  If the romance fails, it creates an awkward environment not just for you, but also for co-workers.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: When you forget what's-his-name...

Have you ever had to introduce two people and you forgot the name of one of them?  "I'd really like you to meet, uh...and you are?..."

Silly tricks like, "Pronounce your last name for me," just don't work.  The person might respond, "It's Smmiiiiitttthhh."

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Let Them Eat...Lunch

If someone is eating lunch at his or her desk, do not loom and ask, "What's for lunch?"  Do not interrupt the person and try to do business. Give them some space.  Respect the lunch.  It's a lot like when people are on the phone - do not hover in the door of their office or cubicle / veal fattening pen.  Unless the building is on fire, do not interrupt them.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Soup Spoons

When you are finished with your soup, if there is a service plate underneath your soup bowl or cup, leave the soup spoon on this plate, to the right of the soup bowl or cup.  If there is no plate underneath, leave the soup spoon in the bowl or cup with the handle at about four o'clock. 

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Thank You for the Crummy Gift

Like or no, sending a thank you note for a gift received -- by mail, not the celebrated "e" kind -- is a must. So what do you say when you receive a gift you do not like?

Etiquette Tip of the Week: VIP Groupie

If you are in charge of the VIP at an event, keep an eye on the VIP throughout the event and make sure he or she is not cornered by a new, unwanted friend who is hogging his or her time. If this happens, you must dive in and rescue the VIP...er, I mean... politely intervene.

Etiquette Tip of the Week: Road Ready

These words of wisdom for the road pop up in various forms from Dale Carnegie to Louis Untermeyer's Golden Treasury of Poetry:
Here lies the body of Michael Shay,
who died maintaining his right of way.
His case was clear and his will was strong,
But he's just as dead as if he'd been wrong.